Jokes for kids aged 12

The Wicked Uncle humourologists have spent hours researching the best jokes for 12 year olds. Our study reveals that jokes which involve people being insulted are definite winners. We can infer that this is probably because 12 year olds are busy preparing to be Teenagers.

A dog walks into a job centre. ‘Wow, a talking dog,’ says the clerk. ‘With your talent I’m sure we can find you a gig in the circus.’ ‘The circus?’ says the dog. ‘What does a circus want with a plumber?’

My girlfriend has just dumped me because she thinks I’m obsessed with football. I’m gutted - we’d been going out for three seasons.

gifts for 12 year old jokesters...

The Sinister Mansion - Exit Game

An Escape Room game for your home, using team spirit, creativity and powers of deduction to solve puzzles - Good luck!

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£12.95

Doctor: You're obese. 
Patient: Whoa, for that I definitely want a second opinion. 
Doctor: You’re quite ugly, too.

I went to a restaurant with a sign that said they served breakfast at any time. So I ordered scrambled eggs during the Renaissance.

The other day my friend was telling me that I didn't understand irony.....Which is ironic because we were standing at a bus stop.

Q. What’s the best part about living in Switzerland?

A. Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.

gifts for 12 year old jokesters...

FLASHING LED BASEBALL CAP

Fun, unique light up cap that is perfect for parties or just looking good.

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£12.95

Someone stole my mood ring. I’m not sure how I feel about that.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

My new hobby is eating clocks. It’s rather time-consuming.

Q. Did you hear about the hyena that swallowed an Oxo cube?

A. He made a laughing stock of himself.

Q. What’s the difference between mashed potatoes and pea soup?

A. Anyone can mash potatoes….

A pirate walks into a bar with a ship’s steering wheel hanging from his crotch. The Bartender says, “What the hell is that?” The Pirate says, “I don’t know, but it’s drivin’ me nuts!”

I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.

Have you heard about corduroy pillows? They’re making headlines.

Sometimes I tuck my knees into my chest and lean forward. That’s just how I roll.